How to be a Successful Paintball Player (Written in Sarcasm)

In Paintball, one must be successful in order to enjoy the game of Paintball. Only then will he or she be accepted into the world of Paintball. In order to do this they must do what it takes to get recognized and remembered by their fellow players. To do this one must ask another player to clean and fix their own equipment, mean while this is happening act as though they are better then the other even if they are not. A quick way to be remembered by your fellow Paintball players is to show up late for your game during tournaments. This will not only cause everybody to wonder where you are remembering you, but this will cause the referees to be grateful to you for allowing them to have a break. Since they have such a busy schedule and do not get breaks often under the blistering sun. Remember they work around when you feel like showing up.

When the game does finally start after your long delay breaking early before the whistle goes can help you get an advantage and won’t get you in trouble. After all you did help them with a nice break. When you get Paintball break, please do wipe it off so you can stay in the game longer. This is another way for others to remember you, and it will make them think you are a really smart player for the referee not seeing. If the referee does pull you from the game though, do yell at them and disagree with their decision. Always disagree with the referee on their decision. Even if you think it is unfair. Call them ungrateful if you will for giving them a break.